Principle costs Principal
It is not cost effective to pay an attorney $250 to fight over $20. Such an obvious truism loses against the rocks of emotion in a divorce. While some attorneys see such silliness as an opportunity to make their mortgage payment early, I thinks its dishonest to promote such behavior. Several random thoughts when people say "It's about the principle":
1. There are many principles out there. Saving money is one of them.
2. Most things are divisible, except children (leaving aside the old testament). Wanting to get the child's first baseball mitt is not about the child or the mitt. And an adult who has a child old enough to have used a baseball mitt should know this.
3. You can always make more money, but you can't make more time. Want to string out the divorce for another 6 months to fight over the IRA? Ok. Bet you would like that six months back down the road when you get diagnosed with a life ending illness.
4. Its not about money, but maturity. Both rich and poor are prone to putting themselves ahead of their children.
5. Unless your partner has recently had brain trauma, he or she is the same person you slept with (with no birth control). In the case of divorce, you promised to be with that person forever. Oftentimes when one party is railing on and on about what a scumbag piece of &^$#* their ex is, the court leans over and says something to the effect of, "he was good enough to marry, but not good enough to see his kid that you choose to have with him?". Or "She was good enough to marry, be the mother of your children, but since she caught you cheating on her, you think she should not have custody of the children now?"
My last point gets to the simple issue of there are no angels in divorce/child custody cases. Just people who make mistakes, and are trying to do what they think is right. There are few principles that one must fight for to the end, and a good attorney will confirm which principles they are. If you find yourself fighting "for the principle of it", "for honor", "because your tired of being pushed around", etc, just keep in mind:
PRINCIPLE COSTS PRINCIPAL
