Family Law Lifeline : Chicago Family Lawyer & Attorney : John Steele Law Firm : IL Divorce & Adoption

I am surprised at how freely car mechanics and waiters give out legal advice.  While normally I am not one to correct strangers at parties when they are trying to explain questions of Constitutional Law (unless they are citing MSNBC), I do wonder why people go outside their area of expertise. I would never try to troubleshoot a car engine, or a tax law question, because I am not knowledgeable about those areas.  That reminds of an often heard complaint people tell me and my attorney friends (yes, attorneys do have friends).  People are often dismayed to find out I do not know every area of law, and am not able to give a legal opinion off the top of my cuff at a dinner party.  1. I try to specialize in a few related areas (prevents complaints and malpractice problems).2. I don't like to spout off legal theories, courses of action to strangers for free (prevents complaints and malpractice problems).3. I will not know all the facts from a half drunk dinner party guest so my answer will normally be off anyway (prevents complaints and malpractice problems).  See a pattern? Lawyers who spent lots of money and time before and after becoming lawyers like to keep their license.  Besides, maybe your mechanic is really smart! 

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Some Clients are really surprised at how long things can take in family law cases.  They ask, "Why is that?"  Well, first, government is not well set up to resolve personal, intensely sensitive problems involving relationships, love, anger, parenting, etc.  Second, people tend to get emotionally involved, and while money cannot buy you a judgment, it can certainly stretch things out.  As any good attorney knows, oftentimes its the client with the deeper threshold for financial pain that wins out.  And third, most family law attorneys don't want the matter to end quickly.  As the legal sherpas of the process, we can manipulate clients, and those on the other side, to prolong the matter.  And we all know why right?  As people who have read my site know, I like to charge flat fees (even though I cannot always do so), and when I am able to, it changes the entire client relationship.  In Divorce cases, parties usually wind down once they get the anger/hurt out of their system.  And as I tell many a client, love is the biggest reason divorces are wrapped up.  Love for the new boyfriend/girlfriend that is.  I can almost always tell when a client has a new serious relationship.  "John, i've been thinking, and maybe its just better to try to work things out and get this over with".  At which point I know that the new relationship has been bearing down on my client.  No matter what women say, they do not like to date married men, even those going through divorce. There is that nagging feeling of "what if he goes back" in the back of one's mind I guess. 

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Leave it to the state to make a system that leaves absolutely no one happy.  As every non resident custodial parent in Illinois knows, parents who do not have custody of the child(ren) are obligated to pay a fixed percentage of their net income to the other parent.   Lost your job? Too bad, keep paying.  You were not told about the support hearing, and had an imputed income assigned to you that is unreasonable? Oh well.  And if you fail to pay your support, whether it is correct or not, then out come the penalties.  Everything from losing your license to ending up in jail. 

On the other side of the equation, there are many parents trying to raise children while the other parent is avoiding paying child support through various means.  For every parent unfairly hurt by a one size fits all child support statute, there is a single parent struggling to raise one or more children without any help from the other parent.  I find it silly that Illinois cannot track deadbeat parents who jump from state to state to avoid paying support.  Those people are jerks.

The reality is that most custodial parents are women and most payers are men.  This affects legislation, and people's mindsets.  For example, until a few years ago, one state near Illinois used the term his or he when referring to the parent responsible for paying child support, and she or her when referring to the custodial parent.  Ouch. The good news (for children) is that courts are actually looking more and more into which parent is better suited to raise the child(ren) in the relationship. 

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